You think raising a baby is hard? It’s demanding and sleepless nights are exhausting, but as a mom with a tween, I’m discovering that raising a daughter can be even tougher.
You’d think that going through a lot of the same experiences as your daughter (you know those “I-hate-my-hair” and “I’m-just-not-perfect” issues) would make navigating these tween years with her a breeze. But when you’re looking at things from the other side, it’s just not that easy.
And the media is no help at all.
Young girls are bombarded with pictures of perfect photoshopped women and of magazine ads of how they’re supposed to appear and act. There’s so much pressure on them to be something they’re not. It’s no wonder my daughter is upset that her hair is not straight enough one day, or curly enough the next day. Or that her lashes aren’t long enough, or that she has a pimple, or that she doesn’t have the right shoes or the right purse or that her outfit isn’t cool enough.
How can we make things easier on our daughters? How can the media help us to help our daughters realize they are beautiful just the way they are?
They can start by talking to us — and the girls! — about the product and not the image. They can show us that every type of person can wear their clothes: short girls, and tall girls, and girls with short hair, and girls with tummies, and girls who like to play soccer and girls who can laugh with their girlfriends. They don’t have to depict the images of girls only being happy by being tall and thin and surrounded by cute boys, and making our daughters feel incomplete because they don’t have what the women in media have.
It all comes down to making a real connection with everyday, real girls. That’s what makes a brand stand out to me. And that’s why I’m always so inspired when I see brands telling women (and girls!) they’re beautiful just as they are. Like Dove’s campaign for Real Beauty and Real Beauty Sketches.
I look forward to a day when more companies think this way.
When I look at my daughter, all I see is a beautiful, perfect girl. And I know the day will come when she does too.
About the author: Stephanie Elliot, in no particular order, is a wife, writer, blogger, book reviewer, editor and mother to three kids, two who have already been tweens, and one who is right smack in the middle of his tween-ness. Her oldest son is driving and her daughter survived her tween years so she must be doing something right. Find out more at http://stephanieelliot.com.
